Brutally Honest

Do you have an employee who is "brutally honest" with co-workers? The kind of person who criticizes other people directly, bluntly and without mercy. They make little effort to be sensitive, diplomatic or kind. They dismiss the fact that the coworker may be upset or feels hurt by what they've said. They often justify their brutally honest approach by adopting the position that someone had to clearly tell the co-worker how things are in no uncertain terms.

In defense of their behavior, the brutally honest person usually takes the position that they are "just being honest" or they "tell it like it is," or they "don't like to beat around the bush." They fail to realize their behavior lowers morale, creates friction within the department and can easily be viewed as a bullying.

As the leader of your department it's your job to counsel the offender. Let them know that being brutally honest is not helpful, and the excuse of "just being honest" or "that's the way I am" is not acceptable. There is no excuse for browbeating or bullying a coworker which may ultimately give rise to complaints of harassment or even a hostile work environment.

The offender needs to understand there are constructive ways to give criticism, and those ways involve empathy, compassion, and understanding. If, after counseling, the offender recognizes the error of their ways and wants to change, you can coach them in how to say things tactfully, diplomatically and in a way that makes other people value and appreciate their feedback. But if the offender can't or won't change their brutally honest ways, then muzzle them. Let them know in no uncertain terms that they are not to evaluate, advise, suggest, recommend or otherwise get involved with co-workers in a way that can be viewed as overt or covert destructive criticism.

About me: Dan Pelley is an educator specializing in management training and development programs for supervisors and other first-line managers in Connecticut (CT), Massachusetts (MA) and Rhode Island (RI). The issue recited above came from a participant in one of his supervisory management development programs.

Copyright © 2009 Daniel W. Pelley
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