Don't Point the Finger

Counseling is the positive side of discipline. Unlike sanctions and punishments, counseling gives you an opportunity to work with the employee to correct the problem or difficulty. To keep things on a positive note, try to avoid "you" statements in your counseling sessions. You statements point the finger at the other person and tends to put them on the defensive. On the other hand, "I" statements tell people how you see the situation.

For example, instead of saying something like "All you ever do is whine and complain about what we're trying to do," try saying something like "I'm concerned that you may be unhappy with some of our recent changes."

The "I" statement is much more likely to be viewed positively, doesn't accuse the employee, doesn't judge the behavior and thus is more likely to start a constructive dialog on the issue.

About Pelleyblog. This blog covers topics of interest to managers, particularly those at the first-line supervisor level. Topics include handling difficult employees, leadership, counseling, coaching, problem solving, lean thinking, motivation and time management.

Copyright © 2009 Daniel W. Pelley
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